Don't Know Squat

I'm closing in on three years here in Japan, and there is a still a lot for me to see and do here. In the time I've been here, I've learned a lot about Japanese culture and Japanese people; I've traveled a bit and met a lot of people. I've embraced new experiences, such as singing karaoke, eating raw things, and being uncomfortably close to stinky businessmen on trains. However, there is one aspect of the Japanese experience that I have yet to succumb to: the squat toilet.

I feel fortunate that I have yet to find myself in a situation in which I find it necessary to use one of these, but I have no doubt that day will come. I've been tempted a few times, but it just seems inevitable that I would either a) lose my balance and fall into the toilet, or b) crap into my pants, which would be totally ironic, and would defeat the purpose of ever attempting the squat toilet in the first place.

Some of my friends have embraced the squat toilet, figuratively speaking of course. Though for them it's a 'remove the pants' affair, which I have to say will be my course when the day finally comes for me to use one of these things. I shan't take chances. In actuality, squat toilets are more biologically healthy for us, so I've read, as the squat position aligns things in a way that is conducive to deucing, as it were.

Squat toilet culture in Japan is also interesting. Most places have both squat toilets and 'western' toilets, a.k.a. 'sitters,' as we in the know refer to them. This squat toilet is located in my building at school. My building is old, thus there is only one 'sitter' in the whole joint. Our library, on the hand, has both a 'squatter' and 'sitter' on every one of it's 11 floors. It seems some Japanese people may prefer 'sitters' to 'squatters,' despite growing up in a culture of squat toilets; I'm sure they weren't thinking of the English teachers when the library was designed.

The other interesting thing is that 'western' toilets in modern homes are very tricked out. Even our meager toilet here in Summerge Four #102 has a heated seat, which is very nice considering the rest of the place has NONE. But in more proper Japanese homes, expect the toilet to have a heated seat, bidet, and some sort of spritzing thingy. Again, I have yet to indulge in these features, partly because I'm afraid I'll end up making a mess, partly because I can't read the labels on all the buttons, which by the way, sit like a control board next to the toilet seat. Also, everyone I have spoken to who has used these features is now fully dependent on them, and I already have enough vices in my life.

Moving on, I had to go into work quite early this morning to do a few things before class. I got in around 7:30. Shortly after getting into my office, I noticed some really cool light outside. Looking out the window, the sun was just making it's way above the mountains, while to the west were some dark rain clouds. Don't know if you can tell but it's actually raining in this picture. It was really cool, everything was kind of pink, and I wasn't fully awake yet, so it was quite a nice atmosphere. Five minutes later the sun was nowhere to be found and it was pissing rain. I felt a lot more tired then, but for the moment it was very worth being up and at work so early. Speaking of tired, I'm quite tuckered out, so I'm signing off.